...for Thou art with me...

Tragedy. Sometimes lives are touched with this phenomenon. Something happens that you can never find a good answer for. A lost loved one, a missing child, unexpected and unwelcome, these are the times when you are going to show what kind of stuff you are made of. In my personal life, I have not experienced anything I would consider tragedy. Just after I was born, however, tragedy came into my family. It robbed us of someone sure to be something great and wonderful. My father was the youngest of three boys. He was the baby, until his little sister was born. One girl in a house of boys? Yes, she was loved, and everything that goes along with a position like that. This is what I know of her. My grandparents were small business owners in the small town, with a motel and restaurant business. They were members of the country club, and dealers of antique cars. They lived in a nice house, and were able to employ a housekeeper. They were wealthy for the town's standards, and well known in the community. As a result, everyone knew my father, and his siblings. My father married my mother young, and they immediately began their family. They were happy, and their future looked bright together. They worked in the family business, and had bought a home. My aunt also married young, and started her family about two years later. Her and my mother were best friends, and pregnant at the same time. My aunt with her first and my mom with her second(me), they were always together. They spent a lot of time that year, I'm sure, planning for the new lives soon to arrive. Well, arrive we did, two months apart. My aunt's marriage was rocky, however, there were signs of physical abuse, and she became withdrawn. Her husband, I am told was a very controlling person. Eventually, she had enough, and decided to end the marriage. The last day of her young life, she was gathering her things to move back home. Her final trip back to her home was to pick up a few belongings, and her daughter. She was leaving, and was determined to do what was needed to get away. She stopped by on her way to ask my father to join her. He was working, however, and didn't feel like he could leave. So, after stealing a bite of his lunch, she left. Forty-five minutes later, he got the phone call. She was dead, and her husband was also. It was a murder-suicide, planned and executed. She walked right into a trap. This tragedy effected the entire small community. She was eighteen, and a young mother. Now my cousin was an orphan, and my father was haunted. From that day forward he never recovered. It is to this day holding him hostage. His older brothers were able to move on and be successful fathers and businessmen. My grandparents and my father were not so fortunate. My dad never overcame the fact that he did not go with her. He feels like somehow he could have saved her. This has led him down a very destructive path in life. It has affected us even up to my children. My father could have been so much more, but he has let a tragedy keep him in bondage for over 30 years. He lost his family, and his self respect. He is bound up in alcoholism, and even lived in the streets for years, homeless, with no feeling of worth. My mom raised us, worked for us, and made it through. She did a great job. How could anyone have expected this to happen? It changed the course of my family, from very functional, to completely destroyed. Have you experienced tragedy in your life? I really believe that it comes for reasons. Sometimes you will never know, but all of it is for a purpose. Tragedy cannot be explained. There is no way to undo it, no one to blame. Too many people make the mistake of turning from the One who could heal them and help them through. God loved my aunt too. He has a purpose for her death, even if just so I would end up in the right place at the right time for Him to reach me. I wish for you to take from today's post that if you have experienced a tragedy, don't make the same mistakes my father has made. Be strong. Turn to the God who loves you, let Him comfort you and guide you through it. He wants to draw you to Him, and for you to depend on Him for your future. He really is a God who is loving, compassionate, and faithful. You may feel at the time that He is against you, but you cannot know his plans for you, you cannot know His great love for you. He gave His only Son so YOU could spend eternity with him. What greater tragedy than losing a child? He GAVE His for you, so he could be your Father. Turn to Him, not from Him. His mercy and grace will help you through whatever you are facing, or have faced in your life. Please, don't make the same mistakes in this time of testing. Tragedy will come in life, if you live long enough. Your reaction will determine your future.